An Extension Of My Arm

I need a new phone. More than that our contract with AT&T is up and we'd like to tell them to jam it. But we're good Christian folk so we're just going to let it go and not resign. There are plenty of no contract plans out there that allow you to bring your own unlocked phone. Problem with no contract is paying out of pocket for the phone.

I have a million and one tabs open on my browser for different phones and reviews and plans. It's all a little overwhelming. What am I willing to pay? What am I willing to live without to save some money? I don't exactly know. I just need something better than what I have.

The iPhone is out. Straight up out. A. It's expensive. B. I don't like the monopoly Apple would have on my electronic life. Right now I think I've narrowed it down to a few phones, still expensive. And it's hard knowing I could resign with AT&T and get an iPhone 4 (enough for me) for a penny. Or cut my monthly bill way down but pay hundreds of dollars for a phone I'll likely need to replace in 2 years.

It's a lifestyle upgrade, as Brian puts it. It's not a necessity, it's a luxury. All I really need is something that will make a phone call. And really, I don't even NEED that. I grew up without cell phones and we all survived. But the world is different now and a cell phone is a basic life necessity. But I don't need all the fancy stuff an $800 iPhone can do or the amazing data capabilities of the Galaxy S3. I just want it. I really really want it.

Jamaica, Anyone?

This week has gotten away from me. I really didn't know what day it was most of the day. Ok, I knew what day it was. It just turns out that I was wrong. I really, honest and truly, thought it was Tuesday all day. Uh.

I am exhausted. Whooped, even. I have fallen asleep on the couch every night this week 2.7 seconds after I put Caleb to bed. I should probably go to bed now instead of writing a blog entry seeing as I'm getting up at 4:00am.

At least work has been taking it easy on me lately. It's been steady but not too crazy and today we revamped our schedules, which I am now in charge of. I don't know how I got suckered into that mess.

I need a vacation.

Take That, Hostess!

Y'all? I made twinkies. I don't know how I became the resident baker at work but I get recruited to bring in something tasty all the time. Over the past 6 months or so it's become sort of game to see who can give me the biggest challenge. They make stuff up and I adapt recipes and try to come up with something delicious. Sometimes it's a complete disaster.

The latest challenge came as a response to the recent event of Hostess closing it's factory doors. Make a twinkie, they said. I was surprised to find a recipe online so easily. I thought about just making them in a cupcake pan, but what fun is that? So I made the molds too.

They turned out pretty well. Not exactly like a twinkie, and everyone agreed they needed more creme filling, but that didn't stop them from eating every last one of them.

You can find the recipe here

Dreams Do Come True

I have hated jeans my entire life. I have a funny body shape and even when I was my thinnest they have never fit me well. I have tried every brand, every style, every fit. Trying on jeans is agonizing and traumatizing for me. I usually leave the store without buying anything and a little bit of my soul left in the fitting room.

Over the years I have come up with a select few pair that are just ok and I have worn them over and over and over. I never have more than two pair at a time that I can wear, usually only one. Then of course there are the "fat pants." Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. Sadly, the fat pants always slowly turn into just pants and the other half decent pair of jeans I own can only be worn with an over-sized sweatshirt to hide the muffin top they give me.

I've been doing well with my diet and feeling better about myself. I've even noticed that my current clothes fit me better and the notch on my belt needed to be adjusted. So I did what any woman in my situation would do. I went shopping. I went jeans shopping. I bought the first pair I put on because were a size smaller and they buttoned. I was a little overzealous. After getting them home I paid more attention to the fit and it still wasn't right. The very next day I was at Costco and they had Lucky Brand jeans for $30. I figure any jeans for $30 is a good deal and Costco has a great return policy so I bought them without trying them on.

Insert shocked face. And a little bit of fear.

I have never. Ever. In my entire life. Purchased jeans without trying them on. I got the same size as the first pair (one size smaller than before!) and crossed my fingers. I got them home, put them on, viola! They fit! More than that, they fit well!! I heard angels sing in my bedroom.

So I did what any woman in my situation would do. I bought more jeans. I happened to be at the Gap outlet the other day and scanned through the clearance section. There, with light radiating from the hanger, was a pair of clearance jeans in my size. My NEW size. I tried them on. Success! I bought them and another 30% was taken off at the register for a grand total of $9.07.

Folks, I just bought two pair of great jeans (jeans!) for a great price and they fit and they are comfortable and they are a new size smaller. I have conquered the world.

The End Of An Era

It finally happened. After 2.5 years at the clinic the grant money used to provide free ultrasounds to uninsured patients has run out. I got my notice on Saturday. I went in for my shift and there was an envelope sitting on the desk with my name on it. We will have patients scheduled through the end of April and then I'm out of a job.

No worries, this is my second job and I'm still stable in my full time position at the hospital. Actually, more than stable. Things are working in my favor lately with a few new opportunities... but I digress.

Leaving the clinic is bittersweet. I hate that job. I complain every Friday night that I don't want to go to work in the morning. I complain every Saturday morning that I don't want to make the 45 minute commute. I complain when I get home about how miserable my day was. But the money kept me there. And it wasn't a hard job, just a bad job.

I was there in the beginning planning stages before anyone knew how this was all going to work out. It was sort of exciting being a part of something new that had such potential to grow into something big. And I'd be able to say I helped start it all. But in 2.5 years it never expanded beyond that one clinic and the foundation that backed the grant apparently will not be providing any more funding.

I think I'll be glad to have my Saturdays back.

Obligatory Vaneltine's Day Post

My husband and I don't really celebrate Valentine's Day. We both have the same theory that you don't need to wait until a special day to do something nice for the people you love. Why wait until Feb 14 to buy flowers when they jack up the price? Do it any day, for no reason other than you were thinking about that person. It means so much more. And chocolate? If we women haven't ruined our New Year's resolutions by now then that giant heart shaped box of assorted deliciousness will. Skip it.

In the past we have spent our Valentine's day at such establishments as Home Depot and Pet-co. It's very romantic. This year we went to the zoo. It was a beautiful day and really wasn't that crowded. We had a great time! Maybe this will be a Valentine's Day tradition, so long as we live in a warm climate.

A sign you've been married too long:

Me: Let's go see a movie

Husband: Oh, I saw a preview the other day I wanted to see.

Me: Great, how about Thursday, I'm not working.

Husband: Thursday is Valentine's Day.

Me: Ooooh. Nevermind, let's just stay home.

One Of Those Days

There are days when I have to hug my son so I don't choke him. There are days when I just need him to be quiet and go away or I might smack him. I lose my patience. I get frustrated. But he's 2, and I'm human. I know my limits, he's learning them.

But there are days when I am so absolutely proud of him and realize the joy that he is and how much I love him. I don't love him any less on the frustrating days, there are just some days when I am reminded of how wonderful he is and how lucky I am to be his mom. I think God gives me these days sporadically so I don't take them for granted.

Today is one of those days. Caleb woke up and saw Brian in the hallway. He said "Mommy go work?" Brian replied, "No, she's here." I came around the corner and he saw me. He got a huge smile on his face, threw his arms out for a hug and yelled "I love you!" Mommy melt. Then Brian asked for a hug too and Caleb said, "No! I hug Momma!" and he didn't let go.

Even on his worst days I couldn't ask for a better kid. I wouldn't trade him for the world. I wouldn't copy him either. He's special and unique, right down to the little vein between his eyes, and he amazes me every day. I didn't think I was ready for him and he completely changed every bit of my life forever, but I can't imagine my world without him now. He is my constant reminder that God knows what's best for me, and being Caleb's mom is the best thing I think can do.

Shapes, Letters, and Algebra

Caleb will be three soon (*gasp*) and ready for preschool. First of all, what? When did I become the mother of a child old enough for school? I know it's preschool and not 8th grade but it's still 5 days a week with real teachers and a real curriculum. Ok, some of the preschools have a real curriculum. I've learned a lot in the researching I'm doing. There are so many different kinds of schools and it's overwhelming.

Montessori.. I've heard some good things about this type of school and also some not so good. They send these kids home with home work. No kidding homework. I'm sorry, my son is three (almost) there is no way I'm going to get him to sit down long enough to focus on doing 10 pages of a workbook, especially after he has spent an entire day with almost no play time. And no imagination? "in a classical Montessori program, a broomstick would only be used for sweeping a floor; it would not "become" an airplane during imaginary play." Nope. Out.

Then there is the Reggio Emilia model where teachers take cues from the children and format the day around what the children seem to be interested in that morning. Ok, again, he's three (almost), he needs more structure than that. The Waldorf model of preschool focuses on "kids' bodies, spirits, and souls with a nurturing, homelike environment that engages all five senses. Creative play is the most important means of learning" So.. it's a hippie day care?

I'm running out of time, too. Preschools are actually really competitive and I should already have been applying and scheduling interviews for fall enrollment. I'm behind the game and stressing out. Honestly, though, he's three (almost). How much can I really screw him up by putting him in the wrong preschool....

A Valentine Shoe Box

I got a shoe box in the mail last night. It was, of course, a red shoe box in honor of the upcoming holiday. I wonder how long it took my mom to find a pair of shoes that she liked that came in a red box. Brian brought it in the house with a concerned look on his face. We just never know whats going to be inside.

She actually picked out a cute outfit for Caleb that he can wear when it starts getting warmer and paper plates that had Thomas the Tank Engine on them. For me, lots of home made chocolate hearts and heart shaped candy suckers and chocolate dipped pretzels with pink heart sprinkles on them etc, etc. I appreciate the gesture but she knows I don't eat that stuff. My friends at work appreciate the gesture more. (So I kept ONE chocolate covered oreo. Call the diet police.)

Here's the shocker. Wrapped separately from everything else in it's own blue tissue paper, distinct from everything else red and pink, was a small little gift that said "Happy Birthday Brian." *gasp* Not only did she acknowledge him but she remembered his birthday! Ok, I may have mentioned it in the last email I sent her. Still, thanks Mom.

Unproductiveness, Not By Choice

I can't get anything done today. I have a whole list of things I need to do, many of which I had planned to get done while at work if it were slow. It's Superbowl Sunday, it's slow. I just can't seem to actually get anything done.

For example, today is my nephew's birthday and, because I'm a terrible aunt, I still need to mail his birthday card. I brought it with me addressed and stamped so all I had to do was hit the ATM at work, put some money in it, and drop it in the mailbox by the front entrance. Problem is that the ATM won't read my card.

I wanted to go through my credit card statement before paying it because something just didn't seem right. The batteries on my calculator died.

And on and on. The universe hates me today.

I Have a Toddler and a Caffeine Problem, Of Course I Have High Blood Pressure

I'm worn out. I can barely get completely sentences out of my head. I didn't get to bed until 2 am because I spent 4 hours at urgent care, urgently waiting. Actually I've gotta say for as busy as they were I got in pretty quickly. It took an hour to get triaged but then they got me back to see a doctor before anyone else that was triaged before me. I still don't know if it's because they considered my case to be the most critical or because they knew I was an employee. We really do take care of our own.

Why was I there? Blood pressure. I've been having headaches again for the past three days. One that lasted almost two days and then yesterday I had one that came right back after the motrin wore off. I took my blood pressure at home and it was high, but it's always a little high and I know my cuff reads a little high anyway. I did nothing about it.

After the next headache I took it again. 165/114. Even if my cuff reads a little high that's still too high. I made Brian take his and it was normal. I decided I needed to be seen since it was getting to a dangerous level. At urgent care it was 181/120.

They did all the right tests to make sure my heart and kidneys were still ok and, after determining that they were, they sent me home with a new script for blood pressure meds. I kind of feel like I could have just taken the left over ones I had at home that aren't even expired and saved myself the 4 hour hassle of urgent care and exposing myself to potential flu victims.

So for now I'm drinking decaf.